The Inspiring Journey of Gary and Sandra Mihelish in Mental Health Advocacy
Gary and Sandra Mihelish became fierce mental health advocates a few years after their son was diagnosed with treatment resistant schizophrenia.
In 1984, their son, Kurt, was 15 years old and had a bright future ahead of him. He did well in school and he was being recruited to join a nationally competitive swimming program in Texas.
But, after the first day of classes his junior year in high school, he returned home and told his parents he was never going back to the classroom.
In some ways, Gary and Sandra weren’t totally surprised. Kurt had been displaying increasingly disorganized and concerning behaviors in the months leading up to his declaration.
It took several years and some terrible experiences with well-meaning mental health professionals before Kurt was given the right diagnosis and an effective treatment.
Gary told me last week that he vividly remembers the callous way in which Kurt’s psychiatrist told the family about his diagnosis:
“If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, then it must be a duck.”
Gary was angry and Sandra was devasted. However, they decided no other family should have to endure what they went through and they joined NAMI Montana in 1993.
NAMI is the National Alliance on Mental Illness, the country’s largest grassroots mental health advocacy organization.
“I found a home there with people like me,” said Gary.
He and Sandra have taught the NAMI Family-to-Family program at least 35 times over a span of 17 years, traveling across Montana to support others who care for family members with severe mental illness.
In 1999, while still working full-time as a dentist, he led a successful grassroots effort to pass Montana’s first mental health parity law.
At the time, lawmakers couldn’t believe he enlisted the support of a health insurance company. Blue Cross Blue Shield of Montana threw its weight behind the measure, ensuring that it passed both chambers of the legislature by an overwhelming majority and became law.
In 2013, Gary was awarded the NAMI Distinguished Service Award, the organization’s highest honor, to recognize his decades’-long dedication to uplifting people with mental illness and their families.
Meanwhile, Kurt earned his GED and his symptoms are under control. He’s been employed at Meals on Wheels for the last 17 years and lives in a home down the street from his parents.
At 82, Gary is long-retired from dentistry, but he remains President of NAMI Helena (in Montana) and goes to the office every day. I asked him how he stays motivated to do this work. He answered:
“I have only one purpose in life. I advocate for people and families with serious and disabling mental illness and I don’t do anything else. And I don’t apologize for that. The people I advocate for are the most discriminated subgroup in our country.”
“And, I don’t like to lose.”
May is Mental Health Awareness Month
